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Friday, December 16, 2016

DECEMBER 17TH: I WANT A CHRISTMAS DRESS

Growing up, part of the excitement of the Christmas season was choosing a Christmas dress, I miss that.  Today we all are so casual, no one ever gets gussied up and I think that's kind of sad.  Back in the day, formal wear was an essential part of our wardrobe, there were formal dances and Christmas pageants and many excuses to wear something  velvet.  Sigh!  We even got dressed up just to eat Christmas eve dinner and go to the midnight service.  Men wore suits and overcoats.  And they looked so handsome in their fedoras.  There were even racks that ran all along the wall of the vestibule in church for hanging them.  The women had their hair "done" at the beauty parlor and wore hats.  I'm sure those dear ladies would never dream of wearing leggings and cleavage baring tops, like many of the  gals do now days. Elderly ladies were dignified back then. They didn't try to look like youngsters.

Preparations for our Christmas dresses began in the Summer.  Back then, there were no thrift stores, but our church held a rummage sale once a year and it was a humdinger.  My mother always hunted for dresses donated by the "big shots", the captain's, doctor's and merchants' wives, that came from fancy New York department stores.  She would use the fabric, buttons  and trims to make our dresses.  She would also look for clothing made of good quality velvet and pretty lace to make collars and belts. No matter how hard the times were, we always had a Christmas dress.

When the Dime Store received their first shipment of Winter fabric, mother would be the first there to get the best selection.  Fabric came in "cuts" pre-cut pieces of various yardages.  We had to sort through large stacks to find matching cuts to obtain enough fabric.  Still to this day I remember a teal velvet dress with a pretty lace collar and one year a peppermint pink jumper with a striped blouse. Very Betsey McCall!   The only compliment I ever received from my grandmother was about a Christmas dress.  She had a stern Victorian upbringing and believed children should be seen and not heard, so it came as quite a shock to me when she  declared that I looked darling in my Christmas dress.  Until then, I didn't even think she noticed me except to tell me to take my elbows off the table. Ha!

And the midnight service will be  forevermore  entangled with the sound of rustling petticoats and the smell of freshly pressed wool.  For Christmas eve was a flurry of activity with pressing father's  suit, brushing his hat. polishing our shoes and starching petticoats into their scratchy stiffness.  Actually  preparations would begin the day before when my long hair was twisted into rag curls.  Anyone remember those?  You'd tie a rag at the top of your head, then coil the  hair along the long strip of cotton, usually torn from an old sheet,then you'd wrap the rag back up the hair and tie it on the top. They looked like large white cocoons hanging from our heads. 

All this to say, I miss the formality of olden days.  I miss when people thought getting dressed up was something to look forward to, rather than something to dread.  I miss the dignity people used to have then, even the poorest of poor would make an effort to look nice, even if it meant just starching their shirt extra stiff or  polishing their shoes.  It was a matter of self-respect and respect for others.  Recently I was listening to some podcasts about modesty and the ladies were saying that being concerned about how you dress is not modest.  I suppose that is true, but still I miss Christmas dresses.  Did you have Christmas dresses growing up?

37 comments:

  1. That was a sweet narrative about your Christmas dress. No, I never did have a Christmas dress. I usually just wore my best school dress or a wool skirt and a sweater. Mom didn't sew, and it was far too luxurious to have a dress just for Christmas. What I really coveted was a little faux fur collar and a matching hand muff. Alas, that was never to be! I do remember how little girls dressed up for birthday parties in my childhood. Dresses, patent leather shoes (or our polished school shoes) and our best manners at every party. And yes, Mom used rags to curl our hair too!

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    1. I wanted one of those collars and muffs too, Isabella! I guess learning to act like a lady is an outmoded idea in this day and age. Such a shame because I think we have lost good old gentility.

      Hugs
      Jane

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  2. i've never heard of a christmas dress but i do remember that we had to put on our sunday best for the day. it's changed so much now, here in Queensland most will have salads & cold cuts instead of the traditional hot meals, some do BBQs.
    fashions also have changed so much too.
    great post
    thanx for sharing

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    1. I guess the Dickensian feast has gone the way of the horseless carriage, Selina. I always feel nostalgic for the past as Christmas approaches. Have a wonderful day!

      Hugs
      Jane

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  3. I don't remember Christmas dresses, but I do remember Easter dresses.

    At the moment I don't have anything 'dressy' in my closet. I hate clothes shopping.

    Have a wonderful Christmas week ~ FlowerLady

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    1. I don't have anything really dressy anymore either, Rainey. Just no place to go to get dressed up for. Although my everyday apparel is considered "dressy" around here. People always ask me where I'm going. Ha!

      Hugs
      Jane

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  4. Oh gee yes! Even for Sunday mass every Sunday. My dad was a semi-skilled laborer whose daily work clothes got quite dirty. Yet come Sunday, he wore his one suit to church. I feel that once people began having more discretionary income, they seemed to begin dressy sloppily. I wonder if materialism contributed to our lack of dignity! My husband wears a suit to church and I always wear a skirt or dress. It is hard to dress up because it isn't as "cozy" feeling but we purposely make the effort to do this. (Not too many others join us!) Hugs, Andrea

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    1. I think people have put comfort ahead of looking respectable. I think dressing for church is in a small way honoring God. If you were to go to His house, you wouldn't go in a t-shirt and jeans, or worse leggings and a tank top. Yet church is His house and look at how people dress. Oh well, I suppose that it's good that at least they go! Ha!

      Hugs
      Jane

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    2. So true...all of what you just wrote..including at least they go...I look around at church and in today's world, it is impressive if people, esp. young people, attend! Hugs, Andrea

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    3. The congregations around here are mainly made up of elderly people, Andrea. Some of them had to consolidate because they've grown so small.
      Hugs
      Jane

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    4. T-shirts and jeans are probably better than muffins and cleavage. :-o But they won't have memories of special clothes and outfits that we have. Perhaps they would think us silly, but I look back fondly on many of those outfits. On the other hand my younger sister hated wearing dresses and getting dressed up for church.

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  5. What a lovely memory!
    We did dress up more years ago, didn't we. I always had the prettiest dresses, although I remember Easter dresses more than Christmas ones.
    My Mom had one of those strict Victorian fathers who thought children should be seen and not heard, esp at the dinner table. I remember Mom telling me one time that she got the giggles during one meal, and her father gave her such a whipping. She vowed if she ever had children that her home would be full of love and laughter, and she gave us a happy home.

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    1. That's wonderful, Kathy! My parents never did anything like whip us, but they were more on the stern side. I remember doing typical young girl things like giggling on the phone and my father always scolding me for acting foolish. Poor dad, he had four daughters and never understand how the feminine gender behaved!

      Hugs
      Jane

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  6. Jane, it's wonderful that you have so many lovely memories from your childhood and so nice that you're sharing them with us. I love that your mom made your dresses. Ours were store bought, but we usually had only one nice dress that was picture-worthy, and it always came from Sears & Roebuck. Without fail. lol However, there are two velvet skirts (a black and a pinky gold) in my closet as I type that I cannot wait to wear to church this season. One was from Walmart that I bought back when Made in the USA was important to that company, and the other was thrifted. They're both made of modern, stretchy fabric, but the luster and warmth are there. I remember how thick and substantial velvet used to be, though, and I have a length of some rose-colored velvet in a box in the linen closet. Now, you have me wanting to pull it out and do something with it.
    Have a lovely day!
    Toni

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    1. My dad was a "Monkey Wards" man, Toni. Remember when families had a preference to which mail-order catalog they used. And remember going to the catalog store to order? Why they existed I'll never know. Couldn't you just fill out an order form at home and send it in?

      Velvet used to made with cotton, now it has some sort of synthetic material and isn't as luxurious. I have a really pretty blue velvet skirt that I thrifted. Was going to use the fabric for crafting but couldn't bear to cut into it, so I had to diet to fit into the waist. Just fits but I wouldn't want to wear it for Thanksgiving dinner! What's your idea for the rose-colored velvet?

      HUgs
      Jane

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  7. What a sweet story, Jane. Thank you for sharing it. I really enjoyed reading it as it brought back similar memories as I usually got a new dress for Christmas when I was a little girl. They were always red velvet, with stiff, itchy lace and they were accessorized with white tights and black patent shoes. Such great memories!

    I also agree with you about dressing up...we don't do it enough any more and I do miss it. I'm guilty of being too casual myself and this was a gentle reminder to make certain events special with the way we dress.

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    1. It's so nice to see you back to blogging, Sandra! Weren't those patent leather shoes the slipperiest things ever? I think that's it! Certain events are more special when you dress for them. Hope you are enjoying the snow! We got eight inches last night!

      Hugs
      Jane

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  8. I love the thoughts of salvaging the fabric & trims from fine thrifted items for your dresses. I meant to say yesterday that I also keep a lookout for nice ribbons for packaging at the thrift shops through the year. My Italian grandfather was a tailor, & made most of our dresses when I was growing up. I can't specifically remember Christmas dresses, but I seem to remember Easter dresses. I'll have to notice when I get out my old photos. I have occasionally bought thrifted clothes just for the fabric. Now I'll be looking for velvet too!

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    1. I bet you had some beautiful dresses, Laurie! Having a professional tailor for a grandfather would be a dream. Did he teach you any methods? I love the end of the year sale our local thrift store has when clothes are seventeen cents each. I always buy some for the fabric, buttons or even for an unusual zipper. At that price, what have I got to lose? Hopefully this year, Ill get a chance to sew more. Have a wonderful weekend!

      Hugs
      Jane

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    2. Sadly no, Jane. My grandmother gave me buttons and cloth to hand sew with, but she passed away when I was still pretty young. I do have my grandfather's treadle machine, though, which my Mom had electrified, & his sewing table. It's one of the few things I said I wanted when my Mom passed. I hope to have it up and running in the next year or two, and love the thought of using it. I think they're probably smiling as I'm learning to sew. Learning zippers are on my to do list!

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    3. Well that's nice that you have his things, Laurie. There's lots of tutorials on YouTube, but do yourself a favor and find an older sewing book from the 30s-50s. They do such a wonderful job of explaining things.

      Hugs
      Jane

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  9. I only had a special dress for Christmas if I had been sent a box of hand-me-downs from my older cousin. She always got new clothes but had TERRIBLE taste, so the boxes were both a blessing and a curse. New (to me) clothes, which I was both desperate and thankful for, but some of them were so ugly! The dresses especially were almost always loud and gaudy--I can remember crying more than once about having to wear her dresses to church. Even then I knew the difference between cheap and nice fabric, between garish and quietly pretty.

    Another thing I remember about Christmas was black Mary Jane shoes. I desperately wanted a pair to wear with white tights like the other girls. But mom said they were impractical and not supportive, so I only had brown oxfords and knee socks for good dress. Two pairs of good shoes was unthinkable, especially since they had to be replaced every year. She did offer to get me the white tights, but I scornfully refused because I knew they would look horrid with the brown oxfords. :^( Gee whiz mom--how could you not know that?!

    One thing I did finally get was a fur hood with ties that ended in furry pompoms and a matching muff that had a silk cord that went around my neck. Mine was white fur, which was much more desirable than the brown fur. For the next few winters I felt like a queen every Sunday, walking into church with my beautiful rabbit-fur hood and muff.

    Sue

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    1. You're mother sounds a lot like my mother Sue. She was very practical in everything, (except Christmas dresses). I remember begging her to cut my sandwiches diagonal-wise instead of straight across (I thought they looked more elegant)and she said she had no time for such foolishness. How much longer would that take to make a little girl happy? Life lessons!

      I also remember hating red knee socks, so one day I snipped a hole into every pair I had. My mother never could figure out how all my red socks got holes in them, And I never told!

      I too, endured a lot of hand-me-downs, being the youngest of four girls. There was four years between each of us, so some of those dresses were quite out of style by the time I got them. My Christmas dress was the only one that was truly mine.. Even the practical dresses my mother made for me throughout the year were made from leftover fabric one of my sister chose. And they say babies of the family are spoiled!

      HUgs
      Jane

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  10. Hi, Jane!
    My Grandmother put my hair up in rags, too, even though i have curly hair. I think she wanted consistency. My mother couldn't be bothered with such nonsense. I don't remember getting a dress just for Christmas but we did dress up for church every week. I'm the oldest of four sisters. When my Mother made the rare catalog purchase, she bought four dresses in four different sizes. This didn't happen but a few times in my life, thankfully. My Mother could sew, but it was mostly shorts and Summer clothes.

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    1. My hair really retains a lot of water, so usually when the rags were undone, my hair was still wet in spite of sleeping in the rags overnight. For some reason my mother dressed my sister that was nearest to me in age,in matching dresses a lot. So I ended up wearing the same dress four years later. I'm really surprised that so few of you had Christmas dresses.

      Hugs
      Jane

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  11. Hi Jane,
    Wow. I feel like I just disembarked from a time-travel machine! ha! I was smelling the older ladies' beauty shop hairspray, the scent of cotton handkerchiefs, "fresh pressed wool," shoe polish, and I think a bit of Avon's Topaz perfume! I was sitting beside my daddy in church and fingering the feather in his light brown fedora... the sound of women's "stockings" swished and the clacking of high heels on the tiled floor made me wish I was all grown up....

    How I miss the "dignity" of how grownups dressed and acted in public places. I've wondered about how they set such a good example for us in this way (1950s, 60s) and why everyone in the subsequent generation then preferred to drop that mode of dressing with dignity? It was all too confining in those break-out, natural-living days of the 70s... and don't even get me started about the 80s! heehee (all the manly styles for women and un-manly styles for men)

    Anyway, thank you for the trip down memory lane, Jane. It made me really miss my Grandma but thinking of her is always a good thing...

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    1. Oh my gosh, Lori! I forgot all about Topaz perfume. It was my mother's favorite. I couldn't wait until I would be old enough to get a bottle of it, with its topaz stopper. Thanks for reminding me! Happy memories!

      I guess it's our rebellious nature that we want to do things differently then the generations that went before us, but what we've lost. I also think part of the problem was our baby boomer generation trying too hard to be youthful. People back in the day, knew they were old and acted accordingly.

      HUgs
      Jane

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  12. Jane I can remember a yellow party dress that I particularly loved and didn't get much wear out of when I was a child. We always wore lovely clothes to church and I have memories of lots of lovely clothes worn over the years. When I was having chemo a couple of years ago and my oncologist would not allow me to return to work for just over 12 months, I made sure I wore lovely clothes during the day. Pretty dresses, skirts and tops in lovely colours and I wore jewelry most days. I did this as part of my healing journey, as a sort of affirmation for life and the good things in it.

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    1. How interesting Sherri. Hope all is well now. I dress in dresses and skirts and put on earrings every day, just because it reminds me of my femininity. And that in turn reminds me to talk softly and act in a gentle manner. I know many don't need the externals and some might think it's frivolous, but for me it helps.

      Hugs
      Jane

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  13. Remember how we cleaned our patent leather shoes? With Vaseline. I can still remember that awful smell on those shoes, but it sure made them shine.

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    1. I forgot how we did it, Cate. I do remember that we used lighter fluid to remove scuffs from our white ones. I guess no one worried about child safety back then!

      Hugs
      Jane

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  14. I had to think a bit about Christmas finery. New England winters were cold, and our lovely old church had a lot of draughty corners even with the furnace stoked to full blast--likewise the 'town hall' where school Christmas programs were held. Thus our new Christmas outfit was apt to be on the warm and practical side--a new pleated woolen skirt and a 'sweater set' perhaps. I remember my mother making herself a claret velvet skirt when a much larger friend brought her a dress that was out of fashion but had a lot of usable material.
    I'm pleased for the younger moms who attend our church, although a bit astonished by the prevalence of leggings and the 'tops'--often festive with lace or trim--that barely cover their bottoms! I wonder: did more formal and 'lady-like' dress encourage better manners in both sexes?

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    1. I think it did, Sharon. Or maybe it was the better manners that encouraged more lad-like dress? I guess it's the chicken before the egg question all over again!

      Our church was so packed on Christmas Eve, that we didn't need to worry about staying warm, but I do remember being disappointed when my mother would make me wear a sweater over my Christmas finery. Claret velvet sounds heavenly!

      Hugs
      Jane

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    2. Easter dresses--with new shoes and maybe a new hat--were the fancy ones. Then like as not, Easter Sunday would be cold and we had to wear
      'winter underwear' or overshoes, or some such clumsy thing that no one hears about anymore. "Tights" are a wonderful wardrobe item, but they didn't come along until I was nearly out of high school!

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    3. We always got our fancy Spring church coat for Easter. Have plenty of pictures of us girls standing out in the snowbanks wearing our Easter finery. Right after the picture was snapped we went inside and put our Winter coats and boots on. In our neck of the woods (Northern Michigan) Easter was a Winter holiday.

      Hugs
      Jane

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  15. Dear Jane,
    We didn't have Christmas dresses growing up. I don't remember having anything like that. But you might like to know that my boss (who is in his 40s like me) wears a fedora every day. Felt in the winter and straw in the summer. He looks like he walked right out of the 1940s. It's great!
    Stay warm,
    Dana

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    1. Your boss is my kind of guy, Dana! It's nice to know there are people out there with a bit of panache. Bet he looks handsome. Most men do in a fedora!

      Hugs
      Jane

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